The Reality to Burnout & Finding Myself Again

Welcome to Radhika’s Newsletter “Intent”. This is your 2x/month guide to purposeful living, wealth-building, and personal growth.

Happy Tuesday! I’m so excited to share this edition of Intent. Today, I wanted to share a little behind the scenes of what led me to burn out the last few months, not realizing it, forgetting who I was, and finding myself again.

I moved back to California six months ago from NYC. I had lived here for five years before that. I didn’t think the move would be any difficult.

For context, I’ve moved 13 different times and lived in 9 different cities in my life. So again, I thought it’d be fine to move BACK to Cali where I’d already lived before.

But in full seriousness, this one’s been a struggle. This is how my year has shaken out:

• January: Thought I’d continue to live in NYC for at least 2 more years

• February: Interviewed and got my dream job in California

• March: Took a family vacation in India, came back to NYC, packed up all our stuff, and started my new job

• April: Moved to California and met my new team in person. Moved into a new apartment. Bought furniture and decor, busy assembling and putting our home together. Feeling good and I think we can adjust to our new lifestyle pretty soon.

• May: Started dealing with tough situations at work, began training for a triathlon, and trying to figure out our new life.

• June: Had two big trips this month. Completed the triathlon (barely). Still balancing work, life, fitness, newsletters, friends, and family. Everything felt like A LOT.

• July: One work trip, one friend’s wedding, one trip to see family (and my grandparents), and my birthday. Still trying to make friends, figure it out. Life’s moving so fast.

• August: Two trips (one for work, one for new friends). Work is becoming even more stressful. Still trying to find the balance.

• September: Took a trip to Japan. Took a true ‘day for me’ and writing this as we speak. Finally reflecting.

2025 has been moving at light speed. As you can see, I’ve barely had time to figure it out. “It” being balance.

I never really thought I needed balance, if I’m being honest. I thought it was a load of crap. For someone who talks a lot about reflection and being intentional, since the move I’ve felt like I was living on passive. Living someone else’s version of life.

Just going about things the way other people wanted me to:

• Doing things my work wanted me to

• Following word-for-word advice from my mentors

• Saying yes to things and events just to make friends and build stronger connections (even if I didn’t want to)

• Acting like I was supposed to

• Watching TV shows and movies people kept recommending

Throughout it all, a few months ago I stopped in my tracks and asked, “Wait… what does Radhika want?”

And the answer… I didn’t know. I really didn’t. My brain was foggy.

If I was given two dinner options, I couldn’t decide. I’ve always been so decisive (it’s a skill I pride myself on). And yet I couldn’t choose between falafel or pasta.

If asked to commit to a plan two months from now, I’d feel immediate anxiety. Internally, I’m screaming: I JUST NEED TIME!

But the logical side of my brain is listing all the reasons why I should say yes: I need to put myself out there. You’ll figure out the balance. It’s good for your social life. It’ll be fun, I swear!

I’ve never experienced burnout like this before. I started calling it my “slump.” To be honest, I didn’t even realize it was burnout. But one day, I looked up why my brain felt so foggy and this was the only answer that made sense.

Oh, and for the first time ever, I was bringing work stress home. I was sleeping with it. The hardest part? It felt like no one understood.

And when I stopped to ask myself, “What does Radhika want?”, I really couldn’t think of an answer. That’s when I knew: I’d lost myself. The person I’d been trying so hard to discover all these years… I lost her. Because I used to be so full of opinions. So full of energy. So full of… me.

So, what’d I do?

First: Nothing. I just sat there, running from one thing to another, slowly realizing that this just wasn’t me.

Second: Then I took that act of doing nothing up a notch. I let myself fully be a couch potato (for the first time in my life). I ordered pizza, grabbed my favorite kombucha, watched a movie or two, and spent the whole day like that. No journaling. No podcasts. No personal development. I didn’t try to “heal” or “reflect” or “grow.” I refused to be productive.

Third: I asked myself, “Well, what did you like to do when you were younger?” So I started experimenting with all my childhood hobbies: I drew, I painted, I played video games, I took a long walk, I went on multiple hikes, I went to a park and had a little picnic, I played tennis again, I went on a fun run, I baked, I cooked, I hung out with new friends and old, I did puzzles, I played card games.

And every few days, I’d just do something that brought joy to my inner child.

Fourth: Throughout my slump, I also lost sight of what made me me. So every time I felt even the slightest spark of, “Oh, this is something I like doing,” or “That’s my strength,” I made a mental note of it. For a few weeks, I’d clarify with myself:

“Oh, I’m actually pretty good at ___.”

“This is why they hired me for the job.”

“This is why certain things in business come easy to me!”

“Wait, that joke was actually pretty good.”

“This (activity) made me so happy.”

Fifth: This last one I recognize isn’t in everybody’s control, but I will say a week-long trip to another country where I didn’t speak the language and had lots of time to just sit and think really helped. I thought more about what I want to do with my time on earth, what my purpose is, what my long-term plan is. Just having that quiet time helped.

And that’s when it hit me!! I haven’t had quiet me-time this entire year 😲

And I realized I haven’t been following my motto for 2025 at all: “Slow down to speed up.”

It’s written right on my phone’s lock screen and I haven’t been doing what I told myself I would.

Now I’m making a commitment to myself and to you that I’m going to have, at the very minimum, one slow down day each month. A day where I either do absolutely nothing or just something that I, Radhika, want to do.

It could be drawing for a few hours and napping for the rest. It could be a face mask or baking a whole loaf of bread. It doesn’t have to make sense. As long as I slow down on purpose and make time to connect with myself.

The only rule is that I check in and ask: “Hey, how are you feeling? What brings you joy? What do you want to do?”

Honestly, I should probably do this weekly. But hey, we all start somewhere.

So if you’re in a slump, I don’t know the perfect answer to get out of it. But I hope sharing my journey helps even a little. You’re not alone. Just check in with yourself. That already counts. 😊 

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Your commitment to living with purpose is exactly why this space exists. Can’t wait to share more in the next edition!

Until next time,
Radhika
Creating a life of purpose, wealth, and growth